Eyeing the world

 I think I'm the kind of person who might end up outsourcing her emotional needs to an LLM chatbot, and it's not even because I would admire the thing. I am just feeling too isolated, too much like a burden, and too different from my current friends. On the one hand, I'm not even sure what I want, and on the other, I would absolutely hate it if someone else were to decide for me. I don't even want to get into the chatbot thing too much. It is designed to mimic empathy, to make you want to talk to it, pay to talk to it more efficiently, maybe even mine your data, because who would admit it these days? I can't say I'm a saint in this regard, yes, I have talked with the robot, I have had it generate images for me, and even after I learned how it was trained. I'm not proud - but I am desperate. I need validation, I need direction, I want to do something good with my life but cannot decide on it. Even now, I am thinking of going back to college, and of learning t...

 whoever read my posts from January, or just has heard me talk about my life, will recall how deep an impression the film had on me. And it's kind of banal, to be frank. I originally watched the film after having read that "the pizza scene" changed someone's life, or body image, or whatever we wish. So, let me first describe what the movie elicited in me. I was, honestly, stunned. Stunned by the travels, the gorgeous foods and people, though I might say the cinematography was average. Good editing, of course, is what doesn't call attention to itself, but good cinematography might be harder to define. I just haven't felt like any of the shots had left any lasting impact on me, or the soundtrack, for that matter. The single exception is the Brazilian song, Samba da Bencao (I apologize for not using the proper letters), the Portuguese immediately stroked my eardrums in a familiar way, and I found the song to be quite soothing, enjoyable. I even have it on my spot...